Wednesday, September 4, 2013

I Coulda Hugged a Duggar (and 8 reasons I didn't)


Every now and again I google the Duggars.  We don't have satellite TV like my richie-rich parents do1, so now that I'm married and living in squalor, I don't get to see this enormous family on a weekly basis.2

After my most recent google spree, Professor woke up to an ambush in bed with the news.  "Honey...HONEY!  Guess who's coming to Kalona on Labor Day?  The DUGGARS!!!"

Needless to say, I made plans to see them with Pookie in tow (Professor decided to stay home and keep the baby out of the heat.  At least, that's his claim...).

We were far enough away that they were basically stick people.  Still, I was in the presence of the Duggars, a family whose life I have watched on TV as I pondered building my own (I even watched their son get engaged and married while I was planning my wedding).

Eventually, the music was done and the Duggar children started filing out of the barn and past us.  Since Professor didn't come with me, I snapped a few pictures as they drew close...but then I got what-a-dirty-papparazzo-you-are stares and put my camera away.

Some people stopped and asked to take pictures with them, get hugs, have books signed.  And I wanted to do the same, but I just couldn't bring myself to, and here are a few reasons why...

1. I feel bad asking for time from people I don't know.  Is this just me?  Aren't they tired of smiling all the time?  Do they really need me hounding them for a picture?  Yes, they're gracious, lovely, giving people...but I still feel like an intruder.

2. I kinda feel like a stalker.  "Oh, hi, we're just meeting for the first time, except I know your name, where you live, what your room looks like and how you shop for groceries..."  Awkward, right?  Am I alone here?

3. I didn't want to get pregnant.  Professor was the one who coined the phrase "hug a Duggar" while we were talking about going (he doesn't share my affinity for the mega family).  This was his gravest concern: that some Duggar fertility would rub off on me and we really don't need another baby just yet, thank you very much.

4. My Duggar-ing days, I think, are coming to an end.  I really enjoyed watching the show while I lived at home and it got me thinking (and googling…) about everything from grocery budgeting to homeschooling.  And while I love the Duggars, we’re very different families with very different ways and means—which is okay.  Wonderful even.  But as my babes grow and my attention is stretched, the Duggars might have to fall by the wayside…unless they pop up on the Today show with an announcement. ;)


Oh, and numbers five through eight?  All the un-Duggar things my daughter mentioned while we were out there that I was certain she would say should we meet the big Mr. and Mrs. and totally prove that we are not very Duggar-ish...

5. Look, Mama, I dancing.  She sang a lot about dreams, which was fine, but she also sang about dancing.  A lot.  Because she likes dancing...a lot.  There's a little Pentecostal in her, but I try to keep it quiet in our little Baptist church.

6. E.T.'s sick in the water!  E.T. is a big dealio in our house these days.  Super cute when we're at home, it's not as cute to scream about sick aliens out of context.  Especially around people who by and large shun movies.

7. Oh, my shorts is dirty.  Ahem.  Yes, Pookie wore shorts before the Duggars and their merry followers.  And I was another offender, jeans and all.

8. Mommy, are those the great kings in the sky?  This is straight out of Disney and has two knocks against it: it's Disney and a movie, but also...away from the context of The Lion King?  It sounds downright pagan.

Yes, I get that they are gracious people and would have rolled with the punches whatever came out of my daughters mouth, but in the end I'm not a meet-the-celebrity type, and that's okay.

Unless next week I change my mind.  Then I'll start singing "shoulda-coulda-Dugga."

How do you respond to meeting famous people?  Am I the only one like this?

1 Like that one, Mom? You and your fancy TV and your dryer and your garage door opener. I'm telling you, I came from the 1%; someday we'll get back there.
2 Like that one, Professor? Squalor...I don't know that we've ever used that word to describe or living situation. I think I like it.

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